(21) another crappy experience

People have been on a terror lately. Just listened to the art of happiness podcast by Dalai Lami. Really cool geez Dalai Lami has been through hell but looks within and wants to spread inner- peace super fun listen. Man can shoulder any kind of suffering as long as he can find meaning in it. I think about my friend Randy's wife had an appendix rupture and had to experience a torturous hospital experience. I yesterday at a pizza place in lakewood mall had a bad experience not sur what it was but 3 times this week after eating had pain now again. It is weird food will be in your stomach and then as it digests ears ring then hands and eye balls throat dry out. feel these effects I have had going on and off now for many years. Someone does not like me, but listen to the podcast some earlier chapters it talks about the mind set of why some people do stuff that is not real nice. Want to get rid of Perrin got a campaign now for that. A social construct always fits well with a social campaign spread fear bread hate. I am not sure pain is the physical aspect but suffering is the mental and thinking of getting different stuff in your drink or water and it being caustic, or poisonous is not real settling. Funny thing is I do not instill or have hate in my veins and I am not depressed or even negative. The brain on stress or trauma is not good emotion overrides rationality. listen to the podcast he mentions acting in adverse behavior is not going to help change your state of mind. I can hurt but I also seek for meaning in everything, and for me to hurt because someone else is hurting this behavior is not normal to act out and hurt people. Self-awareness the hate, seeking meaning by harming others is not an antidote.