(71) copy of email sent to me by me on 11/16/23 at 6:20 am

What happens when someone manipulates your life all around behind you back so that everything that you hope for, wish for, dream about, reinforce everything you do in your life for and around, but it just keeps getting blocked from you and instead these hopes and long term wishes never happen surface instead it just never comes about as reality for you.

What happens is it is like a form of gaslighting or even entrapment.

When manipulated to these degree to where there is no way out of the isolation .I have seen that in a life alone solitude creatively, can be used to psycho-educate why the abuses I am experiencing are happening . This still does not curb feelings that I am just not good enough or honorable nor deserve a relationship or dating so that I just must be crazy.

It really is not fair these outlaw practices that someone employs so that their expectations and what they assume of others and that the categories that the status quo has labled upon someone can come to fruit for them by manipulating everything around in someone’s life so that this is the anomaly.

Is this the tribal politics, identity politics and what is seen to become cancel culture when a leader takes isteps to actually make it the way it must be?

I have heard of and read the studies of status quo and the violence and hatred that comes about if the subordinate challenges the label that the status quo has placed upon. For example, if the subordinate lives in contrast to what is expected or assumed of the status quo by the superior status quo figure. The cancel culture part is the punishment directed at the subordinate which in this case is food assaults all over the place that threaten my health and safety. I cannot help to wonder is this why these practices are outlawed because they are inhumane.

Now at this point we need district attorneys to babysit authority figures in higher places of power that unjustly manipulate and abuse the citizen- corruption. Hidden civil, constitutional, and human rights violations, but also the person being condemned in ways that are not true to them when they are blocked from living their life in a way that is true to their human potential and capacity..

The removal and replacement program I see and am experiencing is a form of societal cleansing maybe not ethnic cleansing, but the foundation of the social construct, social control and us against them dynamics is driven by a leader with an inflated ego derived by a grandiose delusion of power using pseudo- science to condemn someone at a dehumanizing inhumane degree at this level comes from the pathology of a leader that has not adapted to life in a healthy way. Instead the individual is maladaptively functioning in haw they perceive and interpret others as a way to compensate for the feelings of inadequacy and feelings of not being good enough due to long term issues that have not been resolved or addressed in their own personal life. In other words putting their ghosts off onto everyone around them.

My stomach is a mess cannot go out to eat anywhere without threat to my health. I am in survival mode and have adapted to living differently, but they are fine tuning and pinpointing what I buy, where I shop, even more of how to get to where I get water before I do. This is thrilling and exciting, It definitely reinforces the views and beliefs validating superiority and even their own sense of self-righteousness. Entitlement paranoia getting rid of threat a mind now structured to function this way from to much stress. The pathological part is that these risky adverse behaviors that a person is addicted too become even more of a threat to the insecurity of their own selves. Never thinking once what can I do differently?

notes: why dysregulated so no restraint, therefore, act like an impulsive psychopath.

why do I even say this? This email to myself was nothing until it is intercepted, then another food assault Friday 11/17/23 feeling the effect of this at 5:28 as I follow up in this notes section. No resolution then I believe another attempt at a smear campaign at the gym last night. Why is this to keep up the food assaults- defamation of character with an intent to harm me. Why even bother to assault someone you hate or even a subject is against the law, just like attacking someone's character to push an agenda against someone you hate.

If I was a leader of a big family and I am dysfunctional with pathological tendencies does this mean as a leader that my family is going to be dysfunctional as well?

every action that we take does not have to be a reaction based on instinct to emotionally reactivity therefore promoting risky behaviors. Instead, take a moment to detach and relax, and remember that compassion (cognition/emotion) is what regulates sympathetic arousal and this is a necessary step needed to have the negative feedback loops regulate and turn off a stress response.